Someone recently advised me "He chose his life, now he must deal with it." As in the old cliche "He made his bed, now he must lie in it." But what do we do when the bed maker expresses a longing for help? My adviser suggests the fellow must deal with his life choices. My suggestion is, since the fellow has requested help, expressed a formerly hidden feeling of abandonment and desire for aid, should we not now try to give aid? Are we to forever carry on letting him lie in the bed he made? Are we to qualify our aid with conditions such as, if you get out of that bed, now I'll help you? What did Jesus do? When did he walk away from someone asking for help? Did he say to the woman at the well (who was living in an adulterous relationship)"clean up your life, then I'll help you"? No. He said, I know how you're living. It's not good. But I forgive you. I'll help you. NOW go home and clean up your situation. Did he make her feel she was worthless because she'd made wrong choices in life? No, he made her feel he cared, he would help, and she is very worthy. She went away and bragged him up. There's Tough Love, and then there's condemnation. There's giving help with a heart of superiority, and there's giving help because you love that person. Because he's important to you. We all know he's important to God, and God doesn't look at the made bed as much as he sees the condition of the heart of the bed maker. I don't know what my adviser will be doing, but as for God and me, we're going to help. Bed or no bed.