Does anyone really care about our national parks? Does anyone think when they chuck crap out the window of the car? Will anyone sign my petition, if I send it to the prime minister? (Of Canada, I mean. Okay, I know the British PM will get more action, but we have to start at the bottom of the totem pole.) This new petition proposes the BANNNING (and if necessary, the transport) OF DISPOSABLE DIAPERS IN NATIONAL PARKS. What happens is, when persons with infants come to park gates, they are required to surrender all disposable diapers in their possession. If they have no cloth diapers on hand, the park ranger will exchange a portion of the disposables for an appropriate amount of cloth nappies, depending on the expected length of stay within said park. When leaving the park, infants may return the dirty cloth diapers for cleansing or composting, depending on the severity of condition. Of the nappies, not the babies. If possible (in accordance with the distance of transport) the previously deposited disposables will be returned. No disposable diapers will be available for sale anywhere within park boundaries. Cloth diapers will be offered for sale at reasonable prices, as well as diaper exchange services, where infants may exchange soiled nappies for clean. Infants and related caregivers residing within the park as citizens will be required to use only cloth diapers as well. (Unless they are potty trained.) Park employees will receive significantly discounted fees at the diaper exchange service. Not only will this procedure clean up extremely vile and potentially dangerous (to man and beast) littered diapers, it will decrease by tons the amount dumped (excuse the pun) in ...dumpsters. And landfills. Employment will be created via the formation of diaper exchange services. Diaper rash will significantly decrease, while ducks and jellyfish will have the opportunity to NOT fill their guts with plastic bits and silica pellets. When the petition is published, please add your name to the list of supporters.